- Your coffee stays hot all day
- Never have to look very far to find the legal department
- In Hell, you know who drank your Coke in the fridge – Satan
- 30% fewer “Dilbert” cartoons in the break room
- In Hell, that devil-may-care attitude of yours comes in handy
- You get to spend more time with your spouse now
- No more wondering if the boss hates you
- Riding to work in a hand basket beats the hell out of public transportation
- Hourly dunks in searing pools of molten lava actually quite invigorating
- Your office: One free stale donut every Friday. Hell: One brutal mutilation of a “Full House” cast member every Friday
- Your job: Suit and tie. Hell: Pitchforks and attitude
- Ferocious reptilian demons can appreciate a good dirty joke now and then without threatening a sexual harassment complaint
- Microwave popcorn – without leaving your cubicle
