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Put downs

  • Some people are like slinkys. Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
  • It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
  • If idiots could fly, this would be an airport!
  • This is an "A" "B" conversation so "C" your way out of it.
  • Mirrors don’t talk, and luckily for you they don’t laugh either!
  • When blondes have more fun, do they know it?
  • KENTUCKY: Five million people, Fifteen last names.
  • Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
  • Before you open your mouth to speak, please make sure it’s an improvement upon the silence.
  • 100,000,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?
  • Learn from your parents’ mistakes – use birth control!
  • Keep talking, someday you’ll say something intelligent!
  • I’ll never forget the first time we met – although I’ll keep trying.
  • I hear you are very kind to animals so please give that face back to the gorilla.
  • I don’t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
  • Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
  • You’re a good example of why some animals eat their young.
  • If you were any dummer, you’d have to be watered twice a week!
  • You’ll never have a nervous breakdown, but you sure are a carrier!
  • "Your kid may be an honor roll student, but you’re still an idiot!"