Month: May 2010

Kidnappers are not very interested in you.In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.No one expects you to run–anywhere.People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.There is nothing left to learn the hard way.Things you buy now won’t wear out.You can eat…… Continue reading Signs you’re getting old

Operator! Give me the number for 911! Oh, so they have internet on computers now! Bart, with $10,000, we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love! Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand. I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me Superman.…… Continue reading Funniest Homer Simpson Quotes

I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.There is great need for a sarcasm font.How the…… Continue reading Truths For Mature People