A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says, “Imagine there are 5 black birds sitting on a fence. You pick up your BB gun and shoot one. How many blackbirds are left?”The little boy thinks for a moment and says, “NONE!” The teacher replies, “None, how do you figure that?” […]
Eyad SalahA woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter.“What are you doing?” she asked.“Hunting flies,” He responded.“Oh, killing any?” She asked.“Yep, three males, two females,” he replied.Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell?He responded, “Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone.”
Eyad SalahPhone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. Movie nudity is virtually always female. You know stuff about tanks. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase. Monday Night Football. You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. You can open all your own jars. Old friends don’t […]
Eyad SalahA woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk,a carton of eggs,a quart of orange juice,a head of romaine lettuce,a 2 lb. can of coffee anda 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind […]
Eyad SalahThis is an actual job application a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald’s fast-food establishment in Florida – and they hired him because he was so honest and funny! NAME: Greg Bulmash SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person. DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I were […]
Eyad SalahIdiot # 1 I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into […]
Eyad SalahA young single guy is on a cruise ship, having the time of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into an iceberg and begins to sink. Passengers around him are screaming, flailing, and drowning but our guy manages to grab on to a piece of driftwood and, using every […]
Eyad SalahAccording to a news report, a certain school in Garden City, MI was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the washroom.That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving […]
Eyad SalahSave the whales. Collect the whole set A day without sunshine is, like, night On the other hand, you have different fingers. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. I feel […]
Eyad SalahYour last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be president. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. […]
Eyad SalahOn a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels On a Septic Tank Truck sign: “We’re #1 in the #2 business.” Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.” At a Proctologist’s door: “To expedite your visit please back in.” On a Plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.” On […]
Eyad SalahThis eclectic list of websites has so many out of the ordinary pleasures that it is hard to know where to start. This unique list has links to many entertaining and/or useful websites. The sites are not listed in any particular order of importance, and this list is not intended to be an all-inclusive map […]
Eyad Salah