Categories
Entertainment

More funny bumper stickers

  • I like you, but I wouldn’t want to see you working with subatomic particles.
  • I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die
  • If you smoke after sex, you’re doing it too fast.
  • Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
  • There’s too much blood in my alcohol system.
  • I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
  • Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.
  • WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
  • You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
  • BEER: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.
  • So you’re a feminist…Isn’t that cute!
  • I need someone really bad… are you really bad?
  • Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  • Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
  • To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.
  • I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  • The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
  • My kid had sex with your honor student.
  • Don’t hit me. My lawyer’s in jail.
  • If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
  • Help wanted: Telepathy… you know where to apply.
  • Hang up and drive.
  • Lord save me from your followers.
  • Guns don’t kill people, postal workers do.
  • Born again pagan.
  • God must love stupid people, he made so many.
  • I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn’t listen.
  • Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.
  • Friends don’t let Friends drive Naked.
  • Wink, I’ll do the rest!
  • I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
  • Ax me about Ebonics
  • Body by Nautilus; brain by Mattel
  • Boldly going nowhere
  • CATS: The other white meat
  • CAUTION – Driver legally blonde!
  • Warning: I intentionally run over small, furry animals.
  • Don’t be sexist – broads hate that
  • Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway
  • Heart Attacks…God’s Revenge for Eating His Animal Friends
  • He’s not dead, He’s electroencephalographically challenged
  • Honk if you’ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window
  • How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost.
  • I am Homer of Borg. Prepare to be assimi… Oooh! Donuts!
  • If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
  • If you lived in your car, you’d be home by now
  • I’m an imbecile and I vote
  • WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition
  • What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull
  • CAUTION: I drive just like you!
  • If You Don’t Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
  • Impotence: Nature’s Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings."
  • Practice Safe Sex. Go Screw Yourself.
  • It’s Been Lovely, But I Have To Scream Now.
  • "Please Tell Your Pants It’s Not Polite To Point."
  • Don’t Be Sexist – Broads Hate That.
  • Saw It… Wanted It… Had A Fit… Got It!
  • Constipated people don’t give a crap.
  • If you drink, don’t park–accidents cause people.
  • Who lit the fuse on your tampon?
  • My kid got your honor roll student pregnant.
  • To all you virgins: Thanks for nothing.
  • If at first you don’t succeed…blame someone else and seek counseling.
  • If you can read this, I’ve lost my trailer.
  • You’re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.
  • The Earth Is Full – Go Home.
  • I Have The Body Of A God……Buddha.
  • This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren’t Happening To Me.
  • So Many Pedestrians – So Little Time.
  • Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.
  • If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?
  • The Face Is Familiar, But I Can’t Quite Remember My Name.
  • I Haven’t Lost My Mind, It’s Backed Up On Disk Somewhere.
  • If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…
  • Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
  • Necrophillia: That uncontrollable urge to crack open a cold one.
  • Boldly going nowhere
  • Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them
  • 5 days a week my body is a temple. The other two, it’s an amusement park.
  • Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.